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Gags and Jokes - We all
love a good life and what better way than
to start the ball rolling with a few
Paddy and Mick jokes that never fail to
have you doubled over in the
stitches.
1
Paddy
& Mick were strolling along one day,
when they came across a deserted car.
They both jumped in, and started
checking if everything was in working
order. Paddy beeped the horn, "yes that
works ok" he says. Then he flicks on his
indicator and calls to "Mick, stick you
head outta the window and see if it's
working"...to which he replied "it
is...it isn't...it is...it
isn't..."
Irish jokes are commonly told
among friends and family and they are the
highlight of many stand up comediennes
act.
2
Paddy and Mick were working on
a building site, Paddy says to Mick "I cant be
bothered working all day I just want to go
home" so he climbs to the top of the building
site and hangs upside down on a steel girder,
on seeing this the boss shouts up "what
the hell do you think your doing" Paddy says
"pretending to be a light bulb" so the boss
says "go home your being stupid" so he climbs
down and starts walking out. Mick decides to
follow and says "Im going home too" but just as
he was putting his coat on to leave, the boss
shouts "and where do you think your going" Mick
says home because Im not working in the
dark"
Jokes and gags are
a sure way of filling the air with laughter. If
you are going to be hosting a celebration party
like a birthday, anniversary or wedding etc
then consider having a joke book close at
hand
3
Paddy and Mick were
nearing a pub which had been destroyed by
an IRA bomb
only minutes
before. As they passed, a head rolled out of
the smouldering ruins
and across the
pavement before them. Paddy stooped, picked it
up and held it
for Mick to
see.
"Shure now Mick,
isn't this Sean Murphy?"
"No, Paddy, no, it
couldn't be. It's an amazing' resemblance, but
Murphy was
a lot taller than
that."
4
Paddy and Mick go into
the woods on a hunting trip which
entailed camping out. During the night
paddy wakes up and spots something in the
distance - he then wakes Mick and says -
Look Mick - when Mick glances over - a
mans head is hanging out of a crocodiles
mouth - then paddy screams out – thinks
he’s gods gift because he has a lacoste
sleeping bag.
Irish jokes are
only said in jest on this site.
5
Paddy died in a fire and was
burnt pretty badly and the morgue needed
someone to identify the body. So his two best
friends, Mick and Seamus were called
upon.
Seamus went in and
the mortician pulled back the sheet. Seamus
said 'Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him
over’. Following orders the mortician rolled
Paddy over and Seamus looked and said 'Nope, it
ain't Paddy.'
The mortician
thought it all rather strange and then called
upon Mick to identify the body. Mick took one
look at him and said, 'Yup, he's burnt real
bad, roll him over'.
The mortician
rolled him over and Mick looked down and said,
'No, it ain't Paddy'.
A baffled
mortician asked, 'How can you tell?' Mick said,
'Well, Paddy had two assholes.'
‘what, he had two
assholes?' said the mortician.
'Yup, everyone
knew he had two assholes. Every time we went
into town,
people
would say, 'Here comes Paddy with them two
assholes.'
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